There’s a whole lot of pride for this country that’s floating around. I’m proud as hell of the 100-country coalition that has taken a stand against terrorism. Just returned from San Jose and the annual CCI dealer show. Gotta tell you that all the brothers and the movers and shakers in the industry are high on business. They were rockin’ with new parts, the party after the show and hotel sex.
We’re bikers and we’ll keep riding and building until they let us fight. As soon as the fight is over we’re back to chasin’ cute women and being creative again.
Overseas Bike Deal
I copped your deal of the week from the American Motorcycle Dealer magazine. Harley-Davidson in Holland has obtained 75 old police FLH Shovelheads. They’re now for sale. They are either Army or police force units. For more information try: Sales@oit-harley-davidson.com.
The President
The President has asked that women unite ?for a common cause. Extremist men of the Islamic faith cannot stand nudity and consider it a sin to see a naked woman who is not their wife. ??
Tonight at 7, all women should run out of their houses, completely naked, ?in order to weed out the terrorists. ?The United States appreciates ?your efforts. God bless America!
P.S. candles are ?optional
–C.A.
HORSE mag subs are for sale on BikernetJust click on the logo on the home page and it will take you to the deal of the month on the only true, bare bones, chopper mag put together on the East Coast. Give it a go. Good hard working brothers behind it.
For nothing else, check out the cover girl. Good god.
The Power of Turpentine
A little boy was sitting on the curb with a gallon of turpentine and shaking it up and watching all the bubbles. A little while later a priest came along and asked the little boy what he had.
The little boy replied, “This is the most powerful liquid in the world, its called turpentine.”
The priest said, “No, the most powerful liquid in the world is holy water. If you take some of this holy water and rub it on a pregnant women’s belly, she’ll pass a healthy baby boy.”
The little boy replied, “Shoot, that ain’t nothin’. You take some of this here turpentine and rub it on a cat’s butt and he’ll pass a motorcycle.”
–Ray R.
Devil Dolls Calendar Comin’ I just got back from working a booth in Concord at the Larry Eagle Indian/Bazar Customs Open House. It was so frickin’ HOT. Had I known that you were going to be in San Jose, I would have planned my weekend differently so we could hook up in person. I have a calendar to send you. Here’s the cover.
Whazzup with the girl being with another girl? They should BOTH be attacking you in a really GOOD way.
GOTH
Devildoll5@aol.com
We got a new one in the mix. That’s all.–Bandit
Sunday Post Movie Review
On Saturday evening we mulled over the movie selection at the local Safeway. What to get? What to get? We settled on “3000 Miles to Graceland.” I didn’t realize that was the reference you made in the news until after we watched it.??
When the bikers rode up on the red car with Costner in it, I could have sworn you had something to do with it. ?
While we thought the editing, photography and flashy stuff was awesome, Mailman and I agreed they needed a career criminal to advise them on the technical details. Too unbelievable in so many ways, but I guess if you’re into explosions and gunfire, it works. Like how can a guy with six lasers on him and shot to hell already have the time to raise a huge automatic without getting blown away? How can a guy that wiley not hear a zillion feds’ footsteps in an echoing warehouse? Other than that kind of junk, the plot was semi-believable, and of course Mailman really digs Courtney Cox, so …
Helen Wolfe, Bikernet Drag Racing Correspondent
That fuckin’ flick is pure over the top, but fun to watch.–Bandit
Another Deer Hunter Survives
Hey, I’m fine, a little banged up. My right wrist may be fractured. I painted a metalflake Softail frame last night that has to be done in time for the customer to take it to Biketoberfest, and it liked to killed me. But I don’t think there is anything the doctors can do. Everything works. I’ll keep it wrapped and use my left hand for beer drinking.
I’ve got bruises this morning that I don’t know how they got there. My new jacket took the beating,?it has a big road rash right across the shoulder armor,?my helmet has a scuff right across the face sheild. My racing boots are ripped and my racing gloves are torn too. Big ole scuff on my knee…and the bike looks about the same. I rode it home, it needs some TLC about now.?
Fucking deer jumped off an embankment right onto my bike. I literally didn’t see it coming. All of a sudden there was a deer trying to hump my gas tank and down we went. It was surreal. It happened in a microsecond, sky, ground, deer? I was thinking, did I just hit a deer? and then I was up. And the fucking deer shook her head and ran off. It’s deer season today and I think the deer hunters were out baiting fields and had them all shook up.
It was around lunchtime and it was warm, that’s not usual for deer to dart into the road like that in broad daylight. No lesson learned other than good equipment saved my ass. Literally. I’m thinking that maybe a deer radar should be invented, kinda like a bass finder maybe…or a guided missle system for the bike. As long as it was privately built, not sure we can tax the government with that responsibility, what with all the (I hope) firing going on in the FBI/CIA for letting known terrorists take flight lessons and soil our strippers. I’m thinking that the answer is to put strip club owners in charge of recognizing and deporting terrorists….who knows, gotta run, have to get back to work.
–Flynch
PS.(When I got home yesterday and told?Sarah what happened, I asked her to make me an ice pack for my wrist. She wrapped a big venison steak up in a towel. Funny. Real funny.)
New Shopping Cart From Bikernet
Yeah, she took over. Sin Wu, the hottest Oriental broad to ever jump my bones, talked me into taking over the gift area. It was tough. She was forced to make love to the slippery co-ed Coral with those big round, firm…
My God, I can’t go on. On the other hand, I can go on and on, but I better knock it off. This illustration is my payback for a long night of rather outrageous sexual escapades. Sure, I was injured and in a weakened state, but this illustration will ruin me. Check the new gift shop. New shirts and shit will be flying up. We’ll try to give you the best prices on the planet and the coolest shit.
I’ll Jump Out For Now
I’m kickin’ back, watchin’ my back, and running with my bros. I’m anxious to see what will happen next to punks so afraid that they can’t stand up and be men about what they’ve done, so they hide. No where to run to, baby, no where to hide.
Wow, you should have seen some of the bikes at the show. Many of the custom manufactures are history, then again Titan is back under new ownership as well as Ultra. Big Dog is bigger and stronger than ever. Paul Yaffe is building some of the finest bikes on the planet. Jesse James never stops creating something new.
Life just doesn’t get any better. Have a great week. –Bandit
