Knucklebusters - Cantina Style

How America Works Lately

Let’s see if I understand how America works lately… If a woman burns her thighs on the hot coffee she was holding in her lap while driving, she blames the restaurant. If your teen-age son kills himself, you blame the rock ‘n’ roll music or musician he liked. If you smoke three packs a day

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The Ponderous Boozer

Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn’t drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I

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Be Careful When You Drink….

Due to product liability litigation as a result from recent events that occurred during “Bike Week” in Daytona Beach FL, the American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA’s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all containers: WARNING:The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra.

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Basic Diction

I was in one of my favorite scooter shops the other day when in walked one of the largest rookies I’ve ever seen. Imagine a 300-pound Cliff Claven type wanting to find his balls and straddle a piece of good ole American iron. He informed the salesman that he’d never ridden a motorcycle before, and

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Car People Recipes

So often I see a Car Person cut a biker off in traffic and after the biker beats the Car Person to death with a wrench, the bro drives away, leaving a perfectly good kill to go to waste. Now, I’m not one to advocate sparing Car People for any reason, in fact, I support

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New Year Resolutions 2001

With each new year comes new opportunity. We’re all one year closer to those much-anticipated statues of limitations. We’re all one year older, which is a feat in itself. The new year is a time to make resolutions, which will lead to greater happiness, longer front forks, bigger jugs and faster rides. Below are a

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Beer Selections 101

When searching for the perfect beer, it is often helpful to seek the advice of professionals. Having goodly experience in beer, wearing of beer, shampooing with beer and the drinking of beer, I have taken a few minutes out of my overpaid and very slack schedule of women and debauchery to give reviews of some

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Slammed

If you ride motorcycles right and if you ride long enough, you will eventually find yourself in the can, the big house, the pokey, county, or, as the civilians say it, in jail. Now finding yourself in the slammer isn’t any cause for alarm. In fact, I recommend it. It’s a good place to get

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Outlaw Love

In the glamorous world of motorcycling, sex appeal is everything and those who aren?t fabulously hip are soon edged out by the outlaw who knows what bugs go with what outfit. In order to allow everyone a sporting chance to drop their kickstand in a gopher hole, I am listing some of my favorite ways

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Zebra Deals With The Law

Encountering local law enforcement is always a possibility when putting about on our favorite highways and the outcome of these chance meetings can vary greatly depending on your initial response. In order for these outcomes to be as favorable as possible, I’ve listed ten of my most effective initial responses, which I’ve given over the

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