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How Stupid Is Ocasio - Part 2

Ocasio! Presenting the O2 for the idiots!

by J.J. Solari

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After a recent article on this majestic venue that asked the question “just how stupid IS Ocasio?” and which article fell far short of determining an actual number value to this mystery, the work was not done. I mean it wasn’t as though she was cooperating with me, possibly so that she could come to some discovery of this answer herself. I mean, what she would do even if she did know the answer. What would she do with knowing the volume and dimensions of her own stupidity. I don’t know the answer to that riddle. It’s for sure she doesn’t.

So, no sooner does the question get asked here on this channel you are reading, “Just how stupid IS Ocasio?” Bless her goddamn heart she ups and gets right to work to provide some more fodder for perusal of her potential stupidity levels. Perusal means to look-over and maybe use this perusingness to help get closer to an answer. The answer being the one to the question, “Just how stupid IS Ocasio?”

It turns out there’s a video backing-this-up, this further enquiry I am making into discovering the answer to, “Just how stupid IS Ocasio” and whether or not it is included in this report is anyone’s guess. I have provided it, but remember, this is Bikernet. It’s not NASA. It’s

Ok. So, the extremely photogenic but astoundingly airheaded Miss or Mrs. or Ms or Mister Ocasio is talking to some gathered herd-animals in a small room that Trump would have had to bulldoze to make room for HIS crowd if he had been the one speaking….Senyore Ocasio is talking to them about …..well, I don’t know, but I know it wasn’t quantum entanglement and someone pipes up speaking in a legitimate foreign accent from some Baltic cow pasture, or else in a fake Baltic accent from some Romanian cow pasture, and apparently the topic is global warming, which is where the Left spends most of its copious free time since everyone on the Left is on welfare paid to them by everyone on the Right, and yes I am going out of my way to push buttons here because fuck everyone that’s why, and Hilga Czshekislavulvia, fresh from the insane asylum, urgently and with pure utter panic, warns that earth has only two months left of its own existence and that by apparently September we will all be dead.
She apparently does not want this to happen. Judging from her tone of mild-but-increasing hysteria.

Ocasio is demurely, which means very ladylike and a bit fetching, which means hot, she’s standing calmly there but you can tell she has been down this road before with such people at her rallies and you can see her thinking, “This raving nightmare is one of my own creations. I had better be nice and maybe even parental.”

Meanwhile Olga from Kiev is removing her outer shroud to reveal an expertly created message on a t-shirt that says in very readable lettering “Save The Planet. Eat the Children.”

I am not making this up.

This is when Ocasio’s Stupid Circuit gets ignited. You can see the subtle movement of micro muscles in her very attractive face make new connections with nerve endings beneath the skin and Ocasio’s expression turns from one of polite boredom to one of “concerning” as the hacks at the New York Times might say. They may have even invented this word as a condition or entity or state of being rather than what it used to be, namely a “bridge” word connecting two aspects of one sentence, unlike how it is now used, which is as a warning that all of the universe is in immediate danger. So, in other words Ocasio’s expression and hot-body language took on the aspect of Concerning. The situation was now Concerning.

Olga has by now made it clear to everyone in the room, all five people who turned out to see Ocasio in person and from two feet away - Olga has made it clear that she is advocating cannibalism. Not just on embryos and fetuses, no, but on full-on kids in the first and second grades. Ones with bicycles and their own cell phones. She wants to eat them. As plates of food. Because, “We are not doing enough.” “We only have two months!” And her solution to enabling mankind to survive…is to - basically - eradicate mankind. I mean let’s face it, if you eat all the children…who are THEY gonna eat when they reach adulthood? There won’t BE anybody to eat. In fact, they won’t be here either. They will have been eaten by us. In these next two months.

It was at this point when me and Ocasio began to register and incubate two different conclusions. I became convinced that this woman was doing the prank of the year. And doing a superior job of it too.
Democrats, 1961: (Kennedy) Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country....
Democrats 2018: FREE SH*T!
Democrats, 1961: (Kennedy) Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country.... Democrats 2018: FREE SH*T!

Ocasio however was manifesting something akin to thought. She almost went into a state of quiet paralysis. Because if it WAS actually thought….this would have been her first experience at it. Her body and nervous system would have shifted into their first experience of thought-mode. They would have been not just rusty but totally inexperienced. You could see her tinkering with her first infantile experience with Wonder and Curiosity and thinking….”Would this actually work? Would devouring the young actually work to bring to a halt to whatever it is I think is going on? Is it possible this is a good idea?”

Meanwhile Moldavia Yovayetski is getting some traction with her plan to save the earth by killing its inhabitants. She’s upping her hysteria level to approaching-asteroid level and she is making it very clear that there is only one solution that will save the only people worth saving - the people already a lot closer to death than the children are - and that is, not just killing the children but putting them in our mouth, chewing them up, swallowing them, and shitting them out our bungholes. THIS will alter global annual average temperatures.

Meanwhile Ocasio is now almost rendered into time-stop mode. Her hybridized brain, half moron, half supermoron, is quietly vibrating inside her head while outside Ocasio is standing quietly and listening to a crazed potential mass murderer of an entire global generation insist that butchering and then shaking and baking earth’s children is not only a good idea, it’s behind schedule.

Now at this point a normal person would have been forced, if for no other reason than for entertainment value, to make at least a few enquiries. The first one being, at least if I had been Ocasio, the first inquiry, since it was the topic on the floor, would probably be, “How would you go about this eradication? Gunfire? Drowning? Streaming the best of Rachel Maddow?” And then maybe “Would you kill all the kids all at once? Or would there be a waiting list: fat and juicy ones first. Anorexics last.” Another might be, “Why do you think the children will hang around for this to happen once the word gets out.” Another might be “Do you think the parents and relatives of the children will be on-board with this?….even from a comestible aspect?…forget about blood ties and emotional bonds etc: in other words, how do you know kids are even good eating? Have you dipped your toes into this stewpot so to speak? Have you yourself ever eaten a child?”
I mean there was un-mined gold in that room ready for harvesting into one fascinating, even if deranged, interview that would provide entertainment on You Tube for decades to come.
Do you think Ocasio jumped at this chance? Do you think she even was aware that here was an opportunity for comedy immortality?

You are SO far from realizing what was actually going on in Ocasio’s head at this juncture. And, excuse me, I didn’t mean to suggest that something was actually going on in her head. There wasn’t. But outside her head, on her face, there was a conversation going on to anyone paying attention to her and not to the lunatic opting for changing the definition of “childrens’ lunches” from one FOR children to one consisting OF children, and that conversation was Ocasio wondering with whatever serves her for contemplation….. “Is this a good idea?”

“She’s here, at my rally, so that means of course she’s super intelligent….and everyone in the room is looking at her quietly as though she is a spokesman for this notion. Is it possible I am the only one here out of the loop? I must listen some more. I must remain silent and focused on her words. Perhaps this woman is a rising star in the Democratic Party. Perhaps I could put her on my staff. When I am President, I can perhaps make her vice president. I must listen. This is a new idea. It could have merit. If nothing else eating children would get us closer to net zero, whatever that even means, than not eating them because they would never be driving a car or turning on an air conditioner. They would be fertilizing plants: making oxygen. For the next generation of children. That we would eat. I must listen.”

Meanwhile one of the staffers of the near-empty assembly closet approached the now-in-high-gear serial killer and wanted to pull her away from everyone but Alexia Dyslexia Illich Tonsillik was having none of it. A guard was also closing in. Her mike was taken from her and Ocasio then proceeded to explain calmly and measuredly that for one thing, relax everyone, we have more than two months….

“NO WE DON’T!!!” could be heard from a faint screaming voice that could not reach a microphone very well.
Photo by Susan Walsh
Photo by Susan Walsh

“….We have more than two months,” Ocasio then reiterated to her audience who I am sure she was convinced was now wondering if it was true that they only had two months to live unless they ate the children. Ocasio calmly and repeatedly reassured all 50 overweight and mostly female people that the two-month prognosis was in fact inaccurate and off by several years. The implication being that only the lunatic’s calendar was wrong. Not the calamity caused by not obeying Ocasio’s list of edicts. THAT was accurate.

Is there a lesson to be learned here? Yes. That no matter how stupid you might think Ocasio is….you are wrong. She is stupider.

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